A Glass of Chianti

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

And I'm not a man who likes to swear/But I've never cared for the sound of being alone

For those of you who have inquired: wedding planning is going well, but for a variety of reasons (mostly not wedding-related) I'm feeling a little overwhelmed. As I am swimming in a sea of only good things, this is not a complaint but I do have to admit that keeping my head above water is a pretty tiresome activity - regardless of the condition of the water. Getting ready for the big move out East (and.... North!) is a little scary. I'm looking forward to establishing the first glimmers of a household with an incredible Yankee but the rest of the operation is pretty daunting. Texas and New York City just seem big in two completely different ways.
As much as I've grumbled in the past decade or so about high school football culture and the dearth of Catholics and of various other peculiarities which have left me (of all people!) tagged with the descriptor of "intellectual" from about junior high onward, I really can't say that I'm leaving town with anything other than wonderful feelings about my home. I'm going to miss the community that comes from everyone knowing who the star running back was at the local high school a decade ago. I'm going to be upset that the whole town doesn't shut down on Wednesday night because of Baptist Youth Group night. Even though I never quite felt like I belonged because I wasn't the sorority girl type (and I certainly wasn't a Southern Baptist) I think that the real community that goes along with the church and sports types is a good, if a little stifling, model. For many years I wanted to be an insider in those groups - I wanted to change something so that I could belong to the "right" church or be interested in the "right" books. I never could, because those things aren't me but it is still nice to know that there are places that exist where everybody does go to the Friday night game and everybody really does care that you're doing well... even if you're not part of the "group." I can't tell you the number of times in the past couple of months of engagement when it comes up in conversation that I'm moving to New York that the other party will say something to the effect of "Oh, you'll fit in so well up there!". I know why they think this and I do hope they're right but... I'm just a little unsure right now.
At this point, there is only thing that is certain: The Yankee and I will fit in pretty well together in the new apartment and as long as I have him and room for a few shelves of books and a Fort Worth snow globe, we're going to be a pretty happy pair.