Who's gonna fan ya? Who's gonna peel your grapes?

I'm not much of a cat person. I own one, but it's one of those things that happened without much of a choice. Coco was a tiny kitten caught in a rainstorm and crying under a window at 5:30 in the morning. She was too little to be away from her mother, who she had clearly lost. The plan was to take her inside, get her dry and then get her to the Humane Society the next day.
Days are long here in Texas - it's been over a year.
Topping it all off, I have allergies. I diligently take my medicine and Coco and I have an arrangement that she doesn't sleep on my pillows. So, obviously, after a year of being a good cat, where do I find my cat this afternoon after church?
Yeah. We exchanged looks. I won, and then I sang her some Mel Torme as I put her in the living room.
This is what I get for being vulnerable.

What? I can't find lyrics to the song in the subject header. What good is this Internet thing?!
Meh. Go here. There has to be a contemporary song that hits that tone - "If you're so awesome, why are you so lonely?" Any ideas?